Preparing for having a newborn

Preparing for having a newborn:
1) Learn to accept help. You are  not superwoman and it is okay. Having food brought to you for the first month is the best gift ever. And if people offer to help clean. TAKE IT. Do not feel guilty that you cannot get everything you want to done in a day.
2) Having stitches and a non-stop period for 5 weeks is awful. Just walking is uncomfortable. Take epsom salt baths (again this will require help to watch the baby). I unfortunately didn't finally find the time to do this till week 5 and it made a dramatic difference.
3) Don't expect your partner to take on as much as you want with helping with the baby and the house. If you think you're overwhelmed - they are even more so. Of course they don't have the stitches and the uncomfortableness, but they don't seem to feel the need to just suck it up and seem to have to mourn the loss of their old life.
4) Learn how to do anything for yourself in 60 seconds or less. This includes eating, peeing, showering, phone calls, etc. As soon as you try any of these tasks, the baby will wake up and start to cry.
5) You won't be able to exercise and lose your baby weight as fast as you thought. You'll be uncomfortable, you'll be too tired, and you won't have time.
6) Don't try on your pre-pregnancy clothes. I got this advice from a friend and didn't listen. No reason to make yourself feel bad!! I thoroughly resent those women that are able to fit into their old clothes right after their baby is born. And I mean that in the nicest possible way of course.
7) Forget adult conversation. Everything is baby all of the time. No matter what people try to do to talk about something other than the baby, the conversation inevitably turns into talk about poop, breastfeeding, cute things the baby did. I've even caught myself giving my boyfriend the over-exaggerated kiss (sound affects and all) that I give the baby. Although he may act like the bigger baby sometimes... not necessary to kiss him like he is one.
8) Lay down the law when it comes to visitors and relatives. Or at least do the best you can. It's extremely hard. In-laws are invasive and often offensive (for those of you who get along with yours make sure you appreciate them! I have a mother-in-law that came over and told me that she had 4 kids and always had dinner on the table and you have to make your man happy, and I should be cooking during the day to make sure there's food for him when he gets home). It seems every time she comes over she tries to make me feel inadequate. I'm sorry I have a 4 week old and a proper full course meal was non-existent except for when food was brought to us. I made every quick dinner I could think of, and sometimes that didn't even get done.
9) Take time to yourself!! When the baby was sleeping during the day force yourself to put them down and do something for yourself. I used to go sit out on the back porch even for 10 minutes to have a tea and it made my day so much better.
10) Get used to doubting yourself and comparing your baby's progress to others. I'm constantly haunted by the thought that I'm doing something wrong and that Dominic isn't progressing enough and comparing to how other baby's his age are doing. At the same time having other mom's to ask questions about what to expect and what to do was one of the biggest comforts I've had.
11) Don't let people talk you into going against your instincts!! If I had given into my boyfriend and mother-in-law I would have given up on breastfeeding a day after the baby was born and we wouldn't still be going at 3 months. Its the hardest thing to listen to yourself when you have people berating you that he's not eating enough and formula feeding is better (seriously where are they even getting their information?! What they said wasn't even making sense and I knew it was ridiculous but they still made me doubt myself and made it so much harder than it should have been).
12) Get in touch with as many mom's as you can, or family or friends. Having a good support staff will make everything so much better and enjoyable.